[ the digitizer ]*

i am therefore i blog.

Posts Tagged ‘thoughts

Receipts Don’t Lie

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What is it that the more of it that we possess, the lesser that we can actually possess?

If you answered “DEBT” to that one, then you need financial counseling (paging Suze Orman). I’m talking about RECEIPTS as inversely proportional to the actual money we have at hand, the ghosts of the cash past. They are the tangible manifestations of the virtues TRUTH and ASSURANCE: the testament that money actually changed hands (that’s why they call it “cold, hard cash” because they seldom get the chance to warm in our hands) and the promise that it may change back to the same hands again (for those who have returned crappy items before can now say, “Amen!”). They tell a story of our greed or need, the contracts of our endless bittersweet affair with what the Bible calls “filthy lucre”. That in this flux of perpetual wants, they are at the crux of the transience of things, the legacy of impermanence.

Heck, they’re just receipts, and I don’t have to be poetic to say that we have one too many of them.

Yesterday, while rummaging through my black M&FG satchel bag, I realized it was a month’s worth full of them. Normally, I would toss the trivial ones and keep “the testaments, and the promise, and the legacy whatever”, just in case. Then, a ka-ching moment : why not let these receipts tell their own tales — the good, the bad, the cheap and the chic! What would really suck is I will have to scan each one that I will use; but hey, I am not the [the digitizer]* for nothing! Thus, the birthing of my newest baby/category: Receipts Don’t Lie ( “and I’m starting to feel it’s right…” thanks, Shakira).

P. S.

Got receipts that beg to be heard? Better send them over to me, ilovethedigitizer@gmail.com, scanned and accompanied by their stories, before they get the digital equivalent of an Alzheimer’s (where the ink is time-erased or scheduled to magically disappear from the thermal paper they are printed on). It’s a clever way for the merchants to legally expunge our legacy of impermanence, dashing the virtues those receipts actually represent. What a paradox joke, no? [d]*


Written by nealm

8 September 2009 at 8:09 PM


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Solve Me If You CanI ride the bullet of time hitting a target of nowhere. My heart stopped bleeding eons ago, my soul numbed by life’s vicissitudes. Existentialism, Rationalism, Zen– they are nothing but a gamut of superficial self-medications meant to divert one’s mind from the gnawing truth: I am therefore I live. Or is it the other way around? Who cares. I have no time for your psychobabble bull.

You see, I am certain about my ambiguity. An exercise in irony perhaps or just a cute way to tuck away my guilt? Could be. But I have been wrong before and so have you. Who are you to say what is right for my life when there are so many wrongs to right in yours? I have died the moment you chose my life for me. Live and let live. Life is what is, not what could be, should be, must be. I am not your doppelgänger. Get yourself a mirror and it would only cost you a tenth of your poor man’s hourly wage. Remember Narcissus.

If I die alone, so be it. If I am fated to be acquainted with grief, then the hell with your sympathy, thank you very much. I am not a child of the “If” universe. Is it too much to ask to be a master of my destiny?

Thinking is short for feeble-mindedness. Feeling is only for the weak. I haven’t really lived until I let my senses die and give in to my elemental sense of being. I am older than my age, longer than my years, more complex than space and time. If you think you know better, try ignorance.

The future does not exist, and the past is mostly dead weight. Today is all I’ve got along with myself– the only truths I can rightfully lay claim to. I don’t want everything. I desire nothing. But today, in all its objective reality and abstract underpinnings, defines who I am, and I lend it essence and credence in return.

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Written by nealm

29 June 2009 at 7:24 PM

Posted in Musing

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Fly / Flow

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by Richard PetersBlogging is more onerous than I imagined. I had the notion that all I could do is babble away like a child who just learned to vocalize. An apt simile, but I want to do more than just ramble. Thus the conundrum : do I let the words flow like a brooklet enticed by gravity or let them take flight like a rocket reaching escape velocity?

First day of blogging and I’m already having a blogstipation! I’m not gonna bleg though lest I lose the very essence of self-expression. As a guiding principle of writing, I will follow my heart and be honest with my emotions; I will free my mind and open myself to all nuances of truth; I will feed my soul and be all I can be; and I will feast on life and savor what is and what is now.

Whether it’s flow or fly, gravity will keep me in check.

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Written by nealm

21 August 2008 at 4:50 AM

Posted in Musing

Tagged with , , , , , ,